It is often hard to see when someone or something is no longer good for us. Letting go can be scary. The “what ifs” start to play out in our minds (What if I’m wrong about him/her? What if I give xyz away and then I need it? What if I end up alone? What if people think I’m being mean? Etc. . . ) We usually know at some level when it is time to move on and leave behind that which no longer serves us. I think this quote from Nicholas Evans sums it up best, “Knowing is the easy part. Saying it out loud is the hard part.”
In my last journal entry, I introduced using the energy associated with January to let go of those people and things not serving you in regards to will, independence, determination, stubbornness, entrepreneurship, new beginnings, or isolation. Here I will address how I use the collaborative energy of February.
February is represented by the number 2. The energy of 2 relates to communication, collaboration, cooperation, partnerships, and relationships. Communication includes how you present yourself or your ideas, who you talk to, or with whom you discuss things. Are you afraid to express your opinions? Are you confident or afraid to speak up? Do you enunciate? Collaboration and cooperation issues are related to how you interface or work with others. Are you able to take input or criticism? Do you work well with others? Do you always have to be in charge?
Issues in partnerships and relationships involve negative behavior patterns, being too dependent or co-dependent, abuse, or control. Are you holding onto false assumptions about a relationship or partnership? Is the relationship out of balance? Do you need to end an abusive relationship? Has a partnership stopped working?
I used February’s energy to focus on letting go of relationships in which I could not be myself. Most people see me as being a linear thinker, a hard worker, and the responsible one. Although these are true, they may not know I am highly intuitive, creative, and intrigued by metaphysics. Because I was not comfortable communicating from my authentic self, I was missing out on chances to build deep relationships and passing up opportunities to collaborate on ideas. I wanted to be confident when I expressed my beliefs, shed relationships where I could not be myself, and collaborate more on things important to me.
I started by identifying relationships in which I did not reveal my true self. I narrowed down the list by removing work or casual associations, as I did not feel those relationships would benefit from showing my private side. Next I considered whether or not I could reveal my beliefs to those left on my list. If not, I asked myself if I needed to continue the relationship or not. In some cases, such as an older relative, it would serve no purpose to alter the relationship, so I made the conscious decision to make no changes. The results? Some relationships simply drifted away, but those that remained have become closer and more meaningful. Collaborations revealed themselves that I did not expect.
In the next entry I will discuss the seasonal energy of March.